We all wake up with them. Expectations are powerfully charged feelings and impact your day in very real and consequential ways. Whether you expect your work environment to be enjoyable, or just another day to get through…or worse yet, pure dread, expectations set the barometer of your day. Will there be sunshine or storms? Are you excited about the day ahead or would you rather hide under your blanket and ignore the alarm?
It’s not your work, right? It’s the people! If they could just be different!
Let’s face it, life is made up of relationships that are challenging in the best of circumstances, even when we love someone heart and soul. Remove this emotional commitment and the behavior of others can … well … become irritating, filling you with anxiety, frustration and anger.
You walk into your office or work space and that “one person” that seems to easily push your buttons is already doing that “thing” that makes you bristle. Maybe your boss walks past and you are reminded of the raise you didn’t get but deserve. The other half of a your sandwich left in the communal break room is gone, eaten by “you know who.” Those extra files on your desk? Sloughed off by “J…” and not your responsibility.
Flip the scenario. Maybe you are the one being targeted and you have no idea why you are the red circle at the center of the dart board.
How does one survive this kind of emotionally charged environment when the majority of waking hours is spent fulfilling your responsibilities: rent to pay, cars to service, daycare for your children, food on the table? You don’t mind the work but you are beginning to hate your job. Your unhappiness may even follow you home.
Jill Tomac, founder of The Leadership Resource Group coaches organizations on improving work environments for leaders and employees alike. Believing that work can and should be an enjoyable, even a happy and fulfilling experience, she helps her clients learn effective ways to communicate and resolve many of these issues.
“Throughout your life you have most likely been taught, ‘do unto others as you would like to have done unto yourself.’ While this sends a valuable message of treating others with respect and care, it does not work in the realm of communication.” http://resourcesforleaders.com/increase-your-influence/
Her point: we communicate in many different ways: verbally, emotionally, physically and often do not realize our impact. By becoming aware of our effect on others, real, long-lasting change transforms the culture and environment of the work place.
We each walk into environments not as individuals but as a collective mass of our past, our present, and our unique way of being. Everyone has their own experiences shadowing them. But the reality is, we have no power to change others, only influence them by example. By changing our mind through personal awareness and learning new ways to communicate we can not only positively influence others but our own life may end up being the biggest benefactor. Now that is a benefit worth working toward!
Candace George Conradi, Writing Coach
Published Author and Blogger for Women With a Voice