We all wake up with them. Expectations are powerfully charged
feelings and impact your day in very real and consequential ways.
Whether you expect your work environment to be enjoyable, or just
another day to get through…or worse yet, pure dread, expectations set
the barometer of your day. Will there be sunshine or storms? Are you
excited about the day ahead or would you rather hide under your blanket
and ignore the alarm?
It’s not your work, right? It’s the people! If they could just be different!
Let’s face it, life is made up of relationships that are challenging
in the best of circumstances, even when we love someone heart and soul.
Remove this emotional commitment and the behavior of others can … well …
become irritating, filling you with anxiety, frustration and anger.
You walk into your office or work space and that “one person” that
seems to easily push your buttons is already doing that “thing” that
makes you bristle. Maybe your boss walks past and you are reminded of
the raise you didn’t get but deserve. The other half of a your sandwich
left in the communal break room is gone, eaten by “you know who.” Those
extra files on your desk? Sloughed off by “J…” and not your
responsibility.
Flip the scenario. Maybe you are the one being targeted and you have
no idea why you are the red circle at the center of the dart board.
How does one survive this kind of emotionally charged environment
when the majority of waking hours is spent fulfilling your
responsibilities: rent to pay, cars to service, daycare for your
children, food on the table? You don’t mind the work but you are
beginning to hate your job. Your unhappiness may even follow you home.
Jill Tomac, founder of The Leadership Resource Group coaches
organizations on improving work environments for leaders and employees
alike. Believing that work can and should be an enjoyable, even a happy
and fulfilling experience, she helps her clients learn effective ways to
communicate and resolve many of these issues.
“Throughout your life you have most likely been taught, ‘do unto
others as you would like to have done unto yourself.’ While this sends a
valuable message of treating others with respect and care, it does not
work in the realm of communication.” http://resourcesforleaders.com/increase-your-influence/
Her point: we communicate in many different ways: verbally,
emotionally, physically and often do not realize our impact. By becoming
aware of our effect on others, real, long-lasting change transforms the
culture and environment of the work place.
We each walk into environments not as individuals but as a collective
mass of our past, our present, and our unique way of being. Everyone
has their own experiences shadowing them. But the reality is, we have no
power to change others, only influence them by example. By changing our
mind through personal awareness and learning new ways to communicate we
can not only positively influence others but our own life may end up
being the biggest benefactor. Now that is a benefit worth working
toward!
Candace George Conradi, Writing Coach
Published Author and Blogger for Women With a Voice
PA Network
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