Do you rely on
your parents or siblings when there is something that needs to be fix at home?
Do you depend
solely on your colleagues at work?
If you answered
yes, then you should listen to what Pandora Poikilos said:
“We are so
accustomed to the comforts of “I cannot”, “I do not want to” and “it is too
difficult” that we forget to realize when we stop doing things for ourselves
and expect others to dance around us, we are not achieving greatness. We have
made ourselves weak.”
Absolutely. Being
too dependent will blindfold you to your own abilities. You will never know all
the amazing things you can actually do if you do not try.
So check out these
5 steps to stop being a helpless baby always depending on someone else.
Instead, it is time to be independent, get things done and let your awesomeness
shine!
1) Pretend
“Fake it till you
make it.”
Accept that no one
is going to accompany or help you with anything. You are on your own. This is
an important mindset because if you keep thinking that someone will come and
rescue you, you will end up waiting and do nothing. So knock that off.
Play the pretend game
if you have to. Act as if you are all alone in a new city and you know no one.
Whatever that you want, you have to get it yourself. Remember that.
2) Make a plan
“If you hear a
voice within you say “you cannot paint,” then by all means paint, and that voice
will be silenced.” – Vincent Van Gogh
Now you may be
restricted by fear. But the only way to conquer it, is to face it head on.
Follow Eleanor Roosevelt’s advice – do one thing every day that scares you.
Write down all of
the things that you want to do in a month. Start with something small and work
up to bigger things. Don’t worry about the results or how others think, just
empty your mind and do it. This is the best way you gain courage and
confidence.
I’ve always been
scared to shop alone and I wanted to change that. So I pushed myself to go
window shopping for 30 days continuously. It seems so simple and silly but I
struggled. In the end, I’m really happy that I did it and overcame the fear.
3) Learn
“The expert at
anything was once a beginner.” – Helen Hayes
When you are
learning something new, it’s normal to make mistakes or you may be unable to
complete them. We learn the most by failing, so don’t take it personally. After
all, you are not obliged to score full marks on everything, you just need to
try again.
Seek guidance.
There are so many how-to sites, Youtube videos and Dummies books. Ask your
friends or colleagues for instructions on how to do things you don’t
understand. Insist that you do it yourself. Keep on trying until you make it.
4) Celebrate
“Confidence
doesn’t come out of nowhere. It’s a result of something… hours and days and
weeks and years of constant work and dedication.” – Roger Staubach
So, you managed to
change your car tire alone? Now you know how to use a new piece of software?
Well done! Write down the steps you used to accomplish those goals so you can
always refer back to it. Don’t forget to celebrate and keep a record of all
your achievements.
These victories
prove that you can succeed as long as you’re willing to get your hands dirty
and try. Next time when you are feeling a lack of confidence in attempting
harder issues, review these triumphs and move forward.
5) Make a habit
“It’s not what we
do once in a while that shapes our lives. It’s what we do consistently.” – Anthony
Robbins
People are lazy,
and it’s easy to go back to the old ways – always expecting others to get
things done for you. So remind yourself don’t treat this as a one month project
and then forget about it. You need to continue doing stuff and trying things
out whenever you can.
Don’t get me
wrong. I’m not asking you to end any relationships or you have to be totally
alone. Being self-reliance is a wonderful process of discovering your potential
and building a better you.
Now it’s your
turn. Besides these 5 steps, do you have other suggestions on how to be more
independent? Share them in the comments.
______
Noel loves to gain
wisdom from articles and share quotes to brighten your
day. Follow her on Facebook for daily dose of inspiration and happiness.
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